Tips and tricks on how to be an Italian:
1. Wear a really shiny, puffy coat. Like really shiny.
2. Wear very tight fitted jeans, so that we can all tell what your ass looks like.
3. Take 1 cup of cologne and douse your body with it.
4. Use your hands a lot, but make sure you do the correct motions.
5. (If you are a guy), walk up to any woman and say “ciao bella” and invade her personal space.
6. Eat an appetizer of pasta before your main dish of pasta.
7. Drink 3500342898 espressos daily.
8. When you leave a place, say “ciao ciao ciao ciao…” very quickly and repeatedly.